As a child, I remember being a perfectionist. I would get so frustrated if things werenapos;t just the way I had worked them out in my head. Funny, I donapos;t think much as changed in 23 years�My dad (God Bless That Man) would always tell me to take a step back, look at it in a different light, and then I would be able to approach whatever I was doing with a new and usually refreshed outlook. Lately, I find myself doing just as Dad used to always tell me. It never ceases to amaze me that as an adult, I often revert back to child like problem solving. I think itapos;s because as a child, we donapos;t have cynicism to deal with, we are still innocent at heart, and still believe that everything and everyone around us is all about us�It wasnapos;t long ago that I wondered if God was playing games with my life, and doing some type of experiment just to see where my breaking point was. Iapos;d smile and laugh but I often felt empty. I searched near and far for something to fill that hole. Sadly enough, I hurt alot of people in the process, including myself.
But you live and learn right? LIfe has an eerie way of giving you the lessons you need the most. Iapos;ve been handed serenity and grace. But thereapos;s a bonus to lifeapos;s gifts of serenity and peace. Itapos;s called PEACE Itapos;s not sold on a shelf, and usually is a rare item. However, just when you think youapos;ve got it all down, Life will prove you otherwise.
I took myself out of many situations simply because I was incapable of dealing with them at that time. I found peace and a better sense of self. Itapos;s easy to think clearly when your thoughts arenapos;t crowded with meaningless garbage. Iapos;m slowly working myself back into situations I know my heart needs and wants. The only downside is sometimes itapos;s hard to completely start over. So we pray�We hit our knees when itapos;s too hard to stand. When life hurts and uncertainity is a given, Pray Pray like hell�Because the truth is tomorrow may not arrive. And thatapos;s okay with me. I just want to make sure Iapos;ve got friends in high places�
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